Wednesday, November 26, 2008

And now for something completely different.

I swear that I'll have a relevant post here soon! I've just been swamped! In the mean time, enjoy some Bruce Lee nunchuck ping pong!


Thursday, November 20, 2008

Epic box

Try and not get carried away with this... I dare you.

(on a personal note... Joy didn't find this even remotely as awesome as I did. Honestly, sometimes I don't think she really gets the Internet. I mean, this is what it is made for!)

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Why I am going to fail my programming class.

I just had to use Star Wars as an example...

Haydens first fieldtrip to the zoo.

Hayden had his first field trip with his kindergarten class today. It was to the zoo, which we've been to about 100 times, but it was still fun. He got to ride on a bus for the first time. It would have been awesome to ride with him but for some stupid reason we had to ride on a different bus. They had to keep the classes together and we had too many parents so all the parents rode on one bus and all the kids on another. Like I said... it was really stupid. Oh well, he was really excited so I let it slide.


Hayden got teamed up with this boy named Chris. Chris is very introverted and I spent most of the day trying to make him laugh... or even respond to what was going on. He would just sit around while Hayden and the other kids played. It was pretty sad to watch really. Chris had never been to the zoo, which was actually common among Hayden's fellow students. I was pretty shocked because the zoo is pretty cheap and these kids were 5 and 6. How can you live in a city with a pretty nice zoo for 6 years and not take your kids? Oh well, I guess that should be expected.


Hayden got to see the snakes, which are his favorite. Whenever we go to the zoo, this one of the highlights.


They also have a new Africa exhibit. It's really well done, with a lot of fish (which is a shocker to me, being that it was an Africa exhibit) and some fossils and whatnot.


Afterwards, all the kids were beat down tired. We got back to the school at 2:30 and we weren't suppose to leave the class till 3:00. I asked the teacher and she said that it would be 'frowned upon' if I took Hayden earlier. Luckily, I'm a sociopath and I don't care what they 'frown upon' unless it negatively affects my son. So I asked if they would be doing any work for the last half hour. She said no, so I left with Hayden at 2:30. The funny thing was, out of 7 parents there... I was the only one to do this. I'm telling you, San Antonio is the village of the idiots.


When Hayden finally got home he was dragging. So we got home, did his reading homework and pretty much relaxed until bedtime. Unfortunately, nobody explained to Serenity that we were tired. She came home from Grandma's ready to tear the house apart. In the end Hayden lounged while I played Seri out until she took a nap, which I used to make dinner. Not the most relaxing afternoon ever, but it was worth it.

Now speaking San Antonio and our high standard of intellect, I think that the parents of one of Haydens classmates were illiterate. I'm not being funny here, both the mom and the dad did not jive on the reading. I've never met an illiterate person before and I have a hard time imagining how someone who can't read can function in our society. I've seen the specials on TV where the plumber or other blue collar worker is a good father and husband, and then gets found out by the protagonist of the show, much to his embarrassment. Then he attends a 'reading class' (or some other convenient plot device) and the show ends with him telling one of his kids "No, tonight daddy will read you a story!" Yay! tears!! It's funny because the illiterate person is always a white 30 yr old man. Never a minority and never a female. Just an interesting sideline.

Anyway, I view being illiterate as not speaking the native tongue in the country you live in. When I've been on foreign soil , I've always tried to get at least enough of the local dialect to get around. Honestly, it's hard not to. So, when I see people who actually need the other language options that are usually given, I'm pretty confused as to how the manage on day to day events. When it comes to reading... there isn't always a picture option so, what do these people do? Wouldn't they just screw up everything they touch? Case in point, when we first got there ever kid had a name tag. They put their kids on upside down. Now, that might have been just for laughs but it caught my attention.

After we got to the zoo, we went to the bald eagle exhibit. The zoo has an eagle that had been shot by assholes and was rescued and nursed backed to health. Unfortunately, it can never fly again due to it's injuries, so they have it in an open area of the zoo with just a fence in between us and the bird. I think eagles are very beautiful birds and it sucks to see one that cannot fly or even fully open up it's impressive wing span.

This being the case at our zoo, there is a huge sign explaining the birds history and resulting injuries and explaining it's open pen as well. The alleged illiterate father stared at this sign for about 15 minutes before being asked by his wife why the eagle was not in a cage. Well, she actually said "Why don't that bird got no fence around it?" He responded that the bird must be free to fly around but then returns of it's own accord because of it's familiar nesting ground. Ok... it was really "He goes in the air and shit, but then he comes home 'cause that's his home... so he knows it." After that, I had to know the truth.

Thinking quickly, I devised a fool proof plan to check to see if these people could actually read. I decided to try to put them in situations where they would read stuff, and then see if they did. It was a masterpiece in ingenuity. With my plan laid out, I quickly got to work. I became the most inquisitive person ever. I would wait till they seemed to be looking at any sign and then ask a question about it. The deciding event happened right before the reptile house when the illiterate dad was starring at the huge sign on the reptile house that said "Reptile House". I asked him "Where is the Reptile House." and he said "I don't know, I don't think they got one of those."

So there you go, it's not scientific proof but it's good enough for me. I know what you're thinking... who cares. In my defense, we were there for 6 hours and I ticked off the teachers in the first 10 minutes so I had to keep myself entertained. How did I tick them off? I asked if when they see a private school on a field trip do they rumble. She said that they don't condone fighting in kindergarten. I respond that I meant like West Side Story fighting... you know, dance fighting, like all those people in San Fransisco are doing now that prop 8 has passed.

Yep... that was a good one. Oh, BTW... 99.4 on the GPS. I'm going to get in the wifes car to get it in the 120's... then I'll have to start getting inventive. I think I'll go the airliner route next.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Air Force Hand Signals


Sing along!!

Off we go, into the wild blue something!
There's some girls... way over there!
Where's the fridge? Is it in the day room?
While you're there, grab me a beer!
Off to bed, at the hotel we rented.
Gotta love that mini-bar!!
We're the smartest ones, just don't give us guns! HEY!
Nothing can stop the US Air Force!!

(Just to clarify, I loved serving in the Air Force and it is because of what I learned there that I stand where I am today. That being said, I think it's important to laugh whenever you get a chance. So, if you served your country, feel free to laugh. If you didn't, go get a gun and shoot something!)

Well, let's see how this plays out.


I wasn't really crazy about either candidate. I actually think that privatizing social security isn't a horrible idea... and I do think that Obama's health care plan has some merit. On the other hand, I know what tax bracket Joy and I sit in and I know we're about to get whacked. Once again, I didn't vote. McCain won Texas by 55% so... it would have been a nice break from work, but that's about it. My parents voted for McCain... in New York where Obama won by 62%. You have to love the electoral college! Well, that's a different post.

Anyway, I hope that Obama can turn this country around, and really I hope that his election helps ease racial tension in this nation... if his presidency only does that then it's worth it!

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Halloween 2008

Halloween is finally over. This year, instead of hosting it at our house we went to a friends for a small party and some food. Hayden was dressed as a Jedi and Serenity was Princess Lea.


Here's a good picture of Seri in her outfit. Pay no attention to the look that Hayden is giving his friend Gordon.


After some food and playing in our friends backyard we hit the streets. Serenity was insistent upon walking up to every house. The only problem was that at the first house she was allowed to grab whatever she wanted from the candy bowl and decided that it was the rule for every house thereafter. So, she would just walk up to a house and start grabbing whatever candy she could find.


After trick-or-treating we headed back to the house. Serenity then proceeded to drink three apple juice boxes in quick order.


After that she found the doggy door and was pretty much enthralled for the rest of the night.


All in all, it was a great time. Joy had to work so I ended up trying to corral two kids in a house full of kids... which was rather challenging. I think that when it was all over we were all very much glad to get home and get some sleep!