Milestones in childhood

There are a lot of little milestones in a child's life that are a joy for their parents to be a part of. There's the first steps, the first tooth and their first words. A slightly less celebrated milestone is when a kid realizes that their diaper is full of poo. Serenity found her poo today. I'm not going to post any pictures of this but lets just say that she seemed to like the way it squished between her toes and get mushed in her hair. I got to come home to work and be greeted at the door by the poop monster herself.

Another thing has been bouncing around in my mind. Have you ever heard the saying "In the land of the blind, the one eyed man is king." They fail to mention how the one eyed man is king of a bunch of blind people... which must suck! Just the thought of a kingdom full of people who can't find the bathroom is enough to convince me that I'd not really be envious of that guy with one eye.

I bring this up because I whole heatedly believe that San Antonio is the dumbest city in the world. Now, whenever anyone calls anyone else dumb they are at the same time saying that they are smart... or at least smarter than whoever they are talking about. It's not like ugly, you can be ugly and spot other ugly people, that's where ugly kids come from. You can't really be stupid and then call someone else out for being stupid.... because stupidity is relative. So, I know that when I call most of the people in San Antonio, roughly a million people, dumber than tits on a submarine... I know that may make me seem arrogant. Well, I'm not. I really don't think I'm smarter than the average guy... I just work harder than he does. The truth is that I am just so convinced of the rampant stupidity of this town that I can safely say with full confidence that this is the dumbest place I have ever had to live in. Yep, just like that one eyed guy... I'm stuck here, a guy with average intelligence... surrounded by a whole village full of idiots... and they can't find the bathroom.

Oh yeah, that tits on a submarine is brought to you by my old boss who would say that when the situation called for it. I once asked him if he meant tits on a bull or a screen door on a submarine. He turned on me and said "If you saw tits on a submarine you'd think it would be pretty $*#&% stupid right? Well then shut up!" He was a great boss.

Well, that's all I got for now. I have finals for college tomorrow and some more guitar lessons. Now I am officially lousy at playing music... instead of just being lousy at playing random chords. Eh... the only reason I'm trying to learn is for me really, I'm not out to impress anyone. Speaking of speaking, Joy wants to learn Italian. We got the Rosetta Stone for Italian and I loaded it up. I figure it's going to be just like our exercise equipment... except that I can't use the software as a place to hang clothes.